The IEP Meeting: We Just Want Our Kids

The IEP meeting is an annual occasion for most parents of a child with a disability.  "IEP" is short for Individualized Education Program.  For many parents, it is a dreaded event, which causes much tension, anger, anxiety and disappointment, and can be a long, drawn out ordeal.  We recently had our daughter's IEP and today, because their birthdays are only two weeks apart, we had our son's.  It marked our seventh IEP meeting in three years.  And for the seventh time in a row, we had a very good, helpful and encouraging experience.  

Autism is a disability.  The IEP meeting is required by federal mandate through the "Individuals with Disabilities Act," so it needs to happen, usually around the child's birthday.  The IEP meeting is attended by the professionals who are working with the child through the school district.  In our case, it has been their teacher or teachers (both special education and general), their speech therapists, their occupational therapists, the school's assistant principal and, in past meetings, their adaptive physical education therapists.  As a parent you are encouraged to take an active role in the process.  With that in mind, and with advance notice, you are entitled to invite other professionals and advocates to attend on your child's behalf as well.

In a very quick nutshell, the goal of the meeting is to determine for the upcoming academic year the goals and objectives for each child and to produce a written document that states those goals and objectives, and the services that will be administered to attain them.  The past year is reviewed, data and reports are presented and assessed, and goals and objectives are discussed for the next year which usually allows for other issues to be addressed.  If all goes well, we, as parents, and they, as educators and professionals, come to an agreement.  Documents are then signed or given to the parent to mull over for a few days and then sign, or if there are disagreements, to meet again for further consideration, often with lawyers.  

I don't know if we've been lucky.  I don't know if our expectations are different than other parent's expectations.  I don't know if we're just easy to please.  I don't know if our attitude going into the meeting makes a difference.  I don't know if being educators ourselves makes a difference.  I just know that we've always been given services that have been obviously needed and put into very good programs with excellent teachers and highly-qualified professionals who have nothing but the best interests of our children in their minds and hearts. 

If we didn't see significant growth and positive improvements in every aspect of their lives, we would have something to complain and haggle about.  But we do.  We see the hard work of many dedicated people paying off in huge ways.  We can take a metaphorical step back and say, yes, from last year at this time to today, there's been tremendous growth, and more than we could have imagined.  As I am wont to say, I don't believe in miracles, but I do believe in miracle workers, and we've been blessed to have them working their magic on our behalf. 

We don't expect the world.  We don't want it.  We just want our kids.  And that's what they've given us.  We have our kids.    

For that, we are very grateful.